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Maid of Honor Wedding Toast

Expectations can run high. Not only does the audience expect a heartfelt statement, but also a little comic relief. To add to wedding toast public speaking anxiety, you’re presenting to a very diverse audience (from Grandma June to Uncle Ricky), each with different expectations. Don’t fret. With preparation, our tips for overcoming speaking anxiety and an effective herbal supplement, you’ll be able to write and execute your wedding toast in style. Here are some tips to consider:

What you should do:

• Prepare for your wedding toast far in advance (one to two weeks) of your speech. Jotting something down on a napkin immediately before you present will only make you look unprepared. This approach will likely result in considerable public speaking anxiety.
• Prepare notes or an outline. Presumably you are not a professional public speaker; no one is expecting to see Barack Obama. Prepare notes that state your wedding toast introduction and transition sentences verbatim (but don’t read them verbatim) and outline your key topics. If possible, do not read directly from your notes.
• Don’t assume everyone in your audience knows you. What is your name? Why are you giving a wedding toast? Tell your audience that you are the maid-of-honor.
• Tell the audience your relationship to the bride and/or other members of the wedding party. How long have you known the bride (and possibly the groom, if appropriate) and how did you meet?
• Thank the bride and groom for letting you be a part of their day.
• Tell an endearing story about the bride or the bride and groom during your wedding toast. Tell a story that is complimentary and make sure the whole audience will appreciate it.
• Compare notes with the best man. Make sure that you are not planning on telling the same story or joke. Hearing your key joke or story being told right before you speak can create unnecessary public speaking anxiety (stage fright). In addition, you may also want to decide who goes first and plan a transition between presenters.
• Remember, you’re giving a wedding toast; don’t forget to hold a glass.
• A great wedding toast should last five to seven minutes. Most people speak at a rate of roughly 150 words per minute, so plan accordingly. In addition, public speaking anxiety may cause your rate of speech to increase.

What you can do:

• Thank the parents of the bride and groom.
• If you are the first person giving a wedding toast, you may want to welcome the wedding guests. However, remember this is not your day. The bride and/or groom may want to save this for their wedding toast.
• Introduce other members of the wedding party. Again, check to make sure that the bride and groom are not doing this in their wedding toast.
• Tell a joke. This is the most risk you can take when giving a wedding toast. Timing is everything when you’re telling a joke. As a result, your public speaking anxiety/ fear of public speaking may really throw off your timing. In addition, remember your audience. A wedding toast may be the only time in your life that you are presenting to two-year-olds and 90-year-olds at the same time. Your joke may bring your friends to their knees in hysterics, but if may offend other members of the audience.
• Tell a funny story. Again, public speaking anxiety/fear of public speaking may really hamper you efforts. However, telling a funny and endearing story about your relationship with the bride or about the bride and groom can be a very effective wedding toast technique. Remember your audience. A little ‘rubbing’ of the bride is acceptable, but make sure she’s not offended or truly embarrassed.

What you should never do (not an exhaustive list):

• Give a canned wedding toast joke you read on the Internet.
• Make the toast about you. This is the bride and groom’s day, not yours.
• Refer to past sexual relationships you may have had with any member of the wedding party (or anyone else).
• Swear during your wedding toast.
• Give a wedding toast intoxicated.

Joanne Wilgren, Staff Writer ( wilgren.Joanne@bravina.com)

This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration

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